Author: loughlin
☆ Want You To Know: Intergalactic
The (Somewhat) Real World
Darth Vader has been prevented from running in the Ukrainian presidential elections in May. Earth has yet again missed out on a potential galactic empire. Will we never learn?
If you're even remotely incompetent, video games may enrage you. Hence it is not recommended that you go anywhere near QWOP.
Real world athletics isn't much better as the drones have started to attack. This is only the beginning.
In Android news, there'll be ads on your lock screen before long. Allegedly.
Bubble? What bubble?
A Polish politician is travelling to the UK to find out what life is like as a migrant. In the process of solving Poland's emigration problem he has incidentally secured himself quite an amount of media coverage. Well played, Artur Debski, well played.
Today In Facepalm
Kate Mulgrew has caused consternation amongst geeks by providing the narration for 'The Principle'. The Sun really does revolve around the Earth after all. Because of science, apparently.
Because of serendipity, that page also provides today's bottom half of the Internet highlight.
I showed your online tellarium and the animated Geocentricity pictures to our share a lunch together church group. They were very surprised but very interested. Our pastor told us that he believed in Geocentricity.
I sent an email to the president of the world Society Of Evangelical Arminians, informing him about your belief in Geocentricity, and he replied, ‘do you really expect me to answer this email.’
I did not expect this answer. I never replied to him.
Fusion Television
My Heart Bleeds For You, Internet
heartbleed.com, engadget.com, test your server.
Vox.com launched and the New York Times got breathlessly excited about the whole thing, especially the bespoke CMS, Chorus. This must be the first time that a CMS has been described as being "sexy enough to be a recruiting tool." Go here for your helping of card-based journosplaining.
Totally Confused
Angry Apple emails, petrol-sniffing spiders, light on Mars, tipping smart cars and the salvation of your eternal soul is now downloading.
Cold music. A song for Winnipeg winters. 'These Are Grounds For Violence'.
Relevant music. Beastie Boys, 'Intergalactic'
Finally, this is extremely pretty and for a very good cause. Go and make some memories …
☆ Want You To Know: Sussudio
Wazzupp Internet?
Doctors and trolls are doing battle in the depths of the Internet. At the moment it seems the trolls are winning. Perhaps the doctors would have more success if they built a new Twitter and let the trolls frolic there. The US government tried something similar with 'Cuban Twitter'. Zun-Zun-Zuneo (to be sung to the tune of 'Sussudio' by Phil Collins).
USAID, in trying to harass the Cuban government, wound up financially supporting it. As the world has learned in the past year, you can’t talk about freedom of expression online without talking about the integrity of the infrastructure that channels that expression. Over the past year, Americans have learned how much of our own Internet infrastructure is compromised.
/b/ have apparently launched an attack on the World Cup. Seems to be as aimless as many of /b/'s recent projects.
Twitter employees are certainly loyal and know how to get the brand out there no matter what the situation. Claire Diaz-Otiz live-tweeted the birth of her daughter yesterday. Above and beyond the call of duty folks.
Regarding Ireland
Mmmm, Eye Candy
Tetris on a skyscraper. Yellow sticky notes | Canadian Anijam, a collaborative animation
Shakespeare plays as three panel comics.
Totally Confused
Whale poop, #riotselfie, swearing as a foreign language , Sherlock Holmes and Intelligent Design and tour the British Isles in accents.
Today's cover version of David Bowie's 'Heroes / Helden' is by Janelle Monae
☆ Want You To Know: Crowdfunding Rich White Guys
Crowdfunding Grows Up
It’s been an interesting few weeks for crowdfunding. Octopus Raft gave some enraged backers a salutary lesson in what exactly crowdfunding was. Perhaps more importantly it showed what crowdfunding wasn’t, or at least not yet. Funding using this model does not equal investment. Don’t expect a return proportional to the amount you put in when your darling pet project is acquired by some industry behemoth. Expect to get exactly what you were told you would receive when you funded the project.
Still, some investing maxims can be applied to crowdfunded projects. If it looks to good to be true, it probably is too good to be true. The ongoing fuss over GoBe from HealthBe proves this.
Over to David Ahn, writing on imedicalapps.com –
Therein lies the problem with crowd-funding platforms such as Indiegogo and Kickstarter. There is little or no accountability when it comes to these projects.
More troubling, Indiegogo allows for flexible funding campaigns, which delivers your money to the project owners at the time of initial pledge, even if the campaign does not meet its goal. While the GoBe project far surpassed its goal, all initial investors would have been out of their money even if the project did not reach resolution.
As such, all $630k that has been contributed to GoBe is non-refundable at this time, and users are not able to re-gather their money unless the project owner permits.
Always read the small print, although in this brave new world that may not be enough. Indiegogo’s response to Pando showing evidence of what might well be fraud seems to have been to delete their anti-fraud guarantee.
Rich White Guys Update
‘one used to be a dude, one’s super small, one’s hyper-smart’
This is how Rich White Guy Elon Musk described his information security team in some sort of weird attack on satire / defence of humourlessness.
At around the same time one of the Koch brothers took to the editorial pages in the Wall Street Journal to explain what a hard time Rich White Guys were having right now.
Steve Jobs, one of the greatest Rich White Guys ever displayed a rather poor choice of words in a 2010 email which featured a bullet point “2011: Holy War with Google”. Them’s fightin’ words alright.
Winning
Read Before You Write
NPR pulled a rather magnificent April Fools’ prank on the stream-twits. These are the people who don’t actually read anything that appears in their Facebook stream apart from the headline, but immediately crack their knuckles and get stuck into posting comments. On the article they haven’t read.
Games
‘The Guilt Of The Video-Game Millionaires‘
But for many of these young game-maker millionaires, who created their work out of a passion for play rather than prospecting, the wealth and attention can be jarring. In February, Dong Nguyen, the creator of Flappy Bird, a recent iOS game that had inexplicably risen to the top of the App Store charts, stopped selling his game even though it earned him an estimated fifty thousand dollars a day.
The Internet Of Slang
Gawker has banned it. “We want to sound like regular adult human beings, not Buzzfeed writers or Reddit commenters.” Zing! Take that, Buzzfeed writers.
Meanwhile, the-toast.net offers some suggestions for even more Internet slang. Carrie Jewett’s tongue may be slightly in her cheek.
Totally Confused, Weekend Longreads Edition
The Dead Zoo Gang, The People’s Republic of Zuckerstan, The Corporate PR Industry’s Sneaky War On Internet Activism, The Woman Behind Apple’s First Icons and an Excerpt from the Winds of Winter.
☆ Want You To Know: Whatever Happened To ‘Winter Is Coming’?
Game of Thrones returns for it's fourth season this weekend. It seems old habits die hard and 'sexposition' is still an important narrative device. If you've forgotten what's happened up until now, here's a decent recap. As that one is in traditional text format, for good measure here's a recap that uses emoji. 14 most brutal deaths in Game of Thrones as 8-bit GIFs. And finally, 'If The Media Reported The Events Of "Game Of Thrones"'.
Internet
Crowdfunding game of the day: Kickstarter simulator 2015.
Glass is 'merely descriptive', so no patent for you, Google. At least not yet. Yelp reviews might be a bit dodgy. As if that possibility has never occurred to anyone before.
At the start of this week I had heard the name James Franco, but didn't really know who he was. Then the Internet told me he was mostly a creep, and who was I to disagree? Now, at the end of this week it turns out he just has some product to promote.
Local flavour alert. An Irish Farmer's Journal piece about the County Kildare geep is spreading rapidly ('going viral', as many twits are still fond of saying).
To Ponder, Or Not To Ponder?
Very Important Documentary Film
'Catnip: Egress to Oblivion?' [YT]
Art Corner
George Bush paints other world leaders.
JENNA: You think you got to the soul of you?
GEORGE: You're going to have to ask other people who know me better, such as yourself. This is an improvement of the first one I did of myself.
'Two Monks Invent Renaissance Art'
Totally Confused, Mostly Long Video Edition
Books versus movies, Tyrion Lanister slapping Joffrey for ten hours, shrinking women, Hurtigruten timelapse, and fifty years of James Bond.
Cover version of the day: 'Wave of Mutilation', Kristin Hersh
☆ Want You To Know: Underground Overground
Internets Updates
Brendan Eich has previous form in giving money to fringe right-wing groups.
Mike Judge's new show about Silicon Valley culture is called, umm, 'Silicon Valley'. Warning: that article is likely to bring back memories of the awfulness that was the Randi Zuckerberg-produced 'Start-Ups: Silicon Valley'.
Bottom half of the Internet highlight of the day #1: 'The Economist' publishes a nice profile remembering Frankie Knuckles. Commenters start to squabble amusingly over the origins of jazz.
Bonus Frankie Knuckles from 1986 [YT].
Bottom half of the Internet highlight of the day #2: How to explain Bitcoin to a visiting alien.
Well, what we do is we take some black rocks or gas and burn it to boil water, or we flood an area and run water through a small spot, this is all so we get these magnets to turn even if they don't want to. Then we bake sand in to very intricate shapes, which also takes a lot of that fresh-squeezed magnet juice we were talking about earlier. So you put all that magnet-juice in to the sand, and you get certain numbers, and these numbers can be exchanged for food because… well as you can see the numbers are really hard to get! So we figure they must be worth a lot of food.
Worth Pondering
Oireland
According to the Irish Sun, the end may be nigh for TV3. Probably hastened by the impending appearance of a better-funded competitor in the shape of UTV Ireland. Of course, TV3 have been quick to deny this.
Irish media and development agencies, please stop cramming 'Silicon Valley' into soundbites and headlines. We've had fifteen years of it and it really hasn't happened yet.
Totally Confused
FiveThirtyEight.com has a look at the Bechdel Test, Bebo has a video messaging app and it is called Blab, The Gish Gallop, Washington D.C. snowy owl flies again after successful wing repair and digital dinosaurs.
Today's recommended version of David Bowie's 'Heroes / Helden' is by Nena [YT]
☆ Want You To Know: It’s Safe To Come Out Now
It’s Safe To Come Back Out Now
April Fool’s day has thankfully passed without any major casualties. Disappointingly The Onion still refuse to publish only actual news stories on April Fool’s day.
To celebrate surviving April Fool’s day, I recommend playing this highly topical and informative clicking game that will tell you everything you need to know about Bitcoin. Then have a giggle at this journo who was caught looking at dogs on the Internet when he should have been looking at footballers.
Many people have been in this meeting [YT], which is doing the rounds at the moment. People who have not been in that meeting may suspect that it’s an April Fool’s prank. It isn’t. It is horrifyingly accurate.
Keep Your Bible Close To Your Crest
Someone went on a crashing spree through whatever it is Trinity has decided to call itself and then proceeded up Dawson Street, with continued crashing all the while. There were inevitable rumours that the perpetrator may have been upset at the university’s decision to remove the bible from its crest as part of the rebranding. This has to be unlikely, but you can’t keep a good rumour down.
What was also notable was the difficulty some media outlets had in even roughly estimating how old the front gates of Trinity actually are. Hint: it’s not 1500 years.
Known Unknowns
A properly long read, ‘The Certainty Of Donald Rumsfeld‘ from the New York Times. Part 1, 2, 3, 4.
For more long reads and different opinions, keep an eye on Buzzfeed Ideas which has only just launched but looks like it could be an interesting part of the Buzzfeed project.
Anniversaries
The Matrix is 15 years old. I actually would have guessed it came out longer ago than that.
Gmail is 10 years old.
Totally Random, Food Edition
Kit-Kats you bake, burgers you smash, ranch dressing you can swim in, pizza for breakfast and general food eye-candy.
Bonus KitKat. (This one’s about Android, not chocolate.)
Today’s recommended version of David Bowie’s ‘Heroes / Helden’ is by Andrea Schroeder [YT].
☆ Want You To Know: More Cats Than Expected
Somehow, this ended up with much more feline involvement than originally planned. Guaranteed not to happen again until at least some time next week.
Well Played, Metro, Well Played
Medical first as cats are found to pass TB on to their owners
This Can’t Possibly End Well
Things To Ponder
Relevant: long list of facts about cats, compiled by (who else) Buzzfeed.
Why did this sad remix of Pharrell’s ‘Happy’ take so long to appear?
Inscrutable To Most, Headlines Department
It occurred to me that plenty of the headlines I scan daily would probably have made no sense twenty years ago. Here’s a selection (which are all worth reading, I hasten to add).
Mobile Malware Mines Dogecoins and Litecoins for Bitcoin Payout
The coin-mining apps discussed above were found outside of the Google Play store, but we have found the same behavior in apps inside the Google Play store. These apps have been downloaded by millions of users, which means that there may be many Android devices out there being used to mine cryptocurrency for cybercriminals.
Lichdom: Battlemage’s powerful spells channel Borderlands and Dark Souls
Xaviant’s vision for Lichdom is to deliver a game in which the mage isn’t always the “glass cannon” in the back, the fellow that’s capable of doing massive damage but then gets fragged if something dangerous so much as looks his way.
Facebook recruits NASA boffins for robot drone fleet, laser comms lab
The Connectivity Lab plans to use solar-powered drones and satellites fitted with communications gear to relay internet access to areas of medium and low population density, along with new laser-based technologies to create a high-bandwidth transmission network.
Good stuff, right?
Longer Reads
‘Cos it’s almost the weekend.
‘Billionaire Ball’ by Matt Hinton. The excesses of sports departments in US universities. The figures involved are staggering.
Malcolm Harris skewers what he describes as “Actually Journalism”. FiveThirtyEight.com and Vox.com are his primary targets. More criticism of FiveThirtyEight from climate scientists.
What Seems To Be The Problem Here? is the latest instalment in n+1’s series of investigative pieces on Amazon. Ruth Curry of Emily Books gives a lot of insight into what Amazon has done to not just the publishing business but the entire online retailing industry. The prospect of the drones becomes ever more terrifying.
If you’re a millionaire model, YOU TOO can get government funding for your barely fleshed out charity idea. Lily Cole managed to get £200,000 from the Cabinet Office in the UK for a goods and services exchange website whose only currency is love, or thanks, or rainbows, or something.
It’s not unusual for wealthy celebrities, particularly in the fashion world, to support good causes or have whimsical hobbies. What makes Impossible.com highly unusual is that it received support from the taxpayer. And nobody seems quite sure why.
House ♫
The trailer [YT] for forthcoming documentary The House That Chicago Built is worth a look if you enjoy seeing a lot of normally garrulous types lost for words. The film itself is directed by Lil Louis incidentally.
Totally Confused
We demand a hot dog emoji, an end to chemical warfare in the swimming pool, no more bling bishops, less rubbish on the mountain and more bad Reddit AMAs.
☆ Want You To Know: Smoke ‘Em If You Got ‘Em
Smoke Fairies
Listen to this. Because it's damn good.
Vapid
Seems we're now selling one of the most powerful known natural toxins over the counter, mostly unregulated. In packaging that's attractive to children for good measure. Poison centres are issuing warnings.
Whilst e-cigarettes may help some to quit conventional cigarettes, it seems the law of unintended consequences has also kicked in
"E-cigarettes are likely to be gateway devices for nicotine addiction among youth, opening up a whole new market for tobacco," says lead author Lauren Dutra, a postdoctoral fellow at the UCSF's Center for Tobacco Control Research and Education.
General Internets
Rather than copying Facebook and buying something called Octopus Raft or similar, Twitter is taking a different approach. Photo tagging is being rolled out. Because everybody loves being tagged in photos, and those trendy startups like Secret and Whisper aren't all about anonymity (real or imagined).
Fortunately the Wire has put together a guide showing how to turn the damn tagging off. Take that, taggers!
Retweet may be becoming share. To retain users who were having great difficulty figuring out what retweeting did.
Regarding Oculus Rift, Rusty Foster summed it up rather nicely
It was initially underwritten by thousands of suckers via Kickstarter, who got oculus stiffed by this deal and who are, to put it mildly, oculus miffed. "Where's our stockulus!?" they wail. "This is just a big oculus grift!"
via Today In Tabs
Lithium Technologies has acquired Klout. Remember Klout? When people's Klout score was going to determine whether they were hip enough to be allowed into clubs or influential enough to deserve discounts? Good riddance.
Local Edition
Actually not so local any more. The Garda whistleblower / bugging / ombudsman / call recording / resigning commissioner / stubborn Minister affair is now getting international coverage. The Guardian mentions what the most Irish media hasn't, the work of Gemma O'Doherty on the penalty points story and her subsequent dismissal.
Foreign attention has a knack of moving these kind of things on from the heel-dragging stage. Fun times ahead for Minister Shatter.
Rolling Gum-Chewing Game Of The Day
Totally Confused
Giant rat in your kitchen, an entire universe in your kitchen, diplomacy in your International Space Station, hidden Super Earth in your solar system and lunatic charlatans in your Wikipedia.
☆ Want You To Know: Reality TV Revelations?
An article widely circulated recently was billed as being revelatory. The big reveal was that a generous proportion of reality TV is actually scripted.
Had this genuinely not occurred to a lot of people before now? It’s decades since The Real World debuted on MTV. The unreality of the reality of these shows has become more obvious with every passing year.
Charlie Brooker explains how a lot of it is done. Editing.
Meeja Pondering
This has been pretty apparent for the last while. There’s less decent reporting being done. Pretty soon there may not be much left to aggregate and curate that’s of any quality. Thus squeezing the market for aggregation services.
Of course, in future all news is going to be written by robots.
In fact, the BBC may already have deployed some robot sub-editors.
Quote Of The Day
Imagine being described as a wanker by Bono. I do not believe I am exaggerating when I say it would be like your dog standing up on its hind legs in your kitchen one day and suddenly laughing at you for being a dog.
Totally Confused, Somewhat Sartorial Edition
Kim Jong-Un haircuts, smart watch chic, Facebook for your face, homeopathy may contain traces of medicine and cartoon faces